Sunday, January 17, 2010

Blessings in Disguise

So the past month has been rather emotional for me. Partly because I kept getting told that I would go into labor 'any day now' and obviously didn't, and partly that well I'm just pregnant and it comes with the territory. Most of the time I've been pretty good about staying upbeat and not getting discouraged however at night, especially while Aaron is gone it is a little harder to remain as Aaron put it ,'logical'. So with that preface let me share two instances in which my emotions got the better of me and I was truly being cared for by my Heavenly Father.

The first was about a week ago. We thought our little guy was coming any time and I was so anxious at night about something going wrong or not being able to get a hold of Aaron. I was also having contractions all the time that sleep was evading me and I was exhausted. Aaron had to go into work at 8 that night so I had been alone for an extra long night. It was about 4:30 in the morning with only two hours of sleep behind me. I basically had a complete meltdown right then. I decided to call Aaron and at least talk for a minute or two but he didn't pick up. But not a minute later I heard the door open and he walked in. He had gotten his work done early and his boss let him come home early (this never happens). He got my call as he was pulling in. I knew that it was a small tender mercy from the Lord that Aaron was able to be home at the exact moment I needed him the most. I was then able to calm down and sleep the rest of the night with my wonderful understanding husband.

The second happened last night. I was trying to sleep but it was escaping me again when I had the realization moment that I know nothing about being a parent. Another freak out moment. I started telling Aaron that I didn't know what I was doing, I didn't know what to do if he got sick or if he cried all night etc. You can imagine the long list. Aaron did his best to help me realize I would be fine however today at church everything I heard answered every fear I had. We talked about being children of God and our talents we have and the guidence he gives us in Relief Society and it seemed like every comment was directed at my fears of being a mother. Then our regular sunday school teacher didn't show and we went to the family relations class where (go figure) they talked about raising children with the spirit and that we are not left to teach our children on our own. It was exactly what I needed. If nothing else this little guy was delayed just so I could go to church today and recieve that guidance because it will definatly be needed in the upcoming years.

I am so grateful for the small blessing that I have been given and the knowledge that my Heavenly Father truly knows what I need when I need it.